Who Needs Sleep?

I think I've slept too much today. I went to lay down again around 8 and just could not get comfortable any more. John tried helping by putting in a Lewis Black DVD. Normally if I can't sleep I put on a stand up comedy DVD (either Lewis Black or Eddie Izzard) and I'll be out in no time. But I've been laying down so much my muscles started cramping up.

I think in a minute or two I'm going to try and upload all of my 356 challenge photos that I haven't uploaded here yet. There's a lot...and I need to take one for today.

John did even more of my Ethics homework for me, without me even asking! Don't you just love the irony of it all?

Gah. Gotta go figure out a photo for me today, then I may try and post them.

And To Top It All Off:

I'm fucking SICK!!!

Damn it!

BUT John was so sweet and did some of my homework for me!!! Yea!! That means, I technically don't have any to do today...but I still may try and get my paper written tonight so I can go to the zoo tomorrow...unless I feel too much like shit...then I'd stay home.

GAH!!

Today I took a 5 hour moc. test for coding. I got it done in about 4 hours.

I have so much school shit to do this week that I don't believe it to be possible to do and keep my sanity.

So, with that said, I shall be MIA until around the 13th which is when my last final for this quarter is.

John and Kim(ber) move in to the townhouse on the 8th. After this Monday I'm not even going to see John until the 13th 'cause he and I both have way too much shit to do.

Wish me luck.

I'm gonna need it.

Is It Over Yet??

Jessie called Obama the 'N' word to my face today. Then she laughed at me when I got angry at her. I left the table and sat by myself until she left and then I rejoined Amanda and Carolyn. I've never been so angry in my life. I was literally shaking. I WILL NOT associate myself with such a blatant raciest. I CANNOT do that.

I said in this post all I need to say about how I feel on the subject of racism. But today I hear also that Bill O'Reily from Fox News made comments about Obama's wife saying something about needing to lynch her (here's an article about it.). I cannot get over the amount of racism I'm experiencing all of a sudden.

Now I'm watching a documentary on Obama on MSNBC....I am praying that he is elected president. I feel so much hope that he will change things.

I don't know what to say. I'm exhausted; I'm spent. My mind literally hurts from the shit I had to deal with today from Jessie. The only good thing out of this is that I will never deal with her again. I could go into school tomorrow and she may act like nothing happened. But something DID happened. I saw in myself that I can stand up for what I believe in without yelling. I always say, "the louder you yell, the less they'll listen," and that is true. If I had yelled at Jessie she would have gotten defensive. I walked away. I was the bigger person. I walked away.

She ran to Dr. Hammond's office. He's the guy you go to if you have a learning disability or something so you get the accommodations you need. She's in his office (literally) at least once a week, often more. For petty things. In coding today, she came in late and said she was in Dr. Hammond's office.

I did NOTHING that I could get in trouble for. No matter how angry she is at me. I walked away. I did not say anything that could be taken as a "verbal attack" or "assault" because I SAID NOTHING. And I have 2 witnesses.

I wish I didn't have to go to school tomorrow. I don't know how much more drama shit I can take. (Note that this was not the only drama that took place today...the other things are very inconsequential but added to my stress level.)

Tomorrow is Thursday (my Friday)...one more day. One more day.

Black History Month Means NOTHING to Jessie

So, this post will actually be about school today and not the weekend, like I had wanted it to be. I guess I should say it's more about people and their attitudes and why I am still constantly surprised by them.

First of all, today at school my friend Carolyn had a conversation with Jessie which, sadly, I was not present for. I need to preface this: I DO NOT LIKE Jessie. She is a narrow minded, hypochondriac who must meddle in everyone's business. I do not wish her any harm. I just wish she would leave me alone. I have actually told her to her face that I do not like her, and she laughs and calls it our "banter" and "what we do." Ok, there is no "we." She just does not get the fact that I can't stand her. She's like a stray cat that you fed once and now won't leave you alone.

Ok, so with that said, Carolyn and Jessie were sitting in the lunch room before class and some how the subject of the presidential election came up. And some how or another Jessie called Barack Obama the 'N' word. She actually used the word. I was speechless when Carolyn told me this.

I knew for a while now that Jessie is prejudice...she told me in so many words when discussing why she was so angry that her sister in law was marring a black man. I was just flabbergasted that she actually used that word.

There are reasons that at school I do not tell everyone that my boyfriend is transgendered. I do not want to risk what could happen if someone was to find out. Jessie told me that she has "no problem with gay people." (And I know I'm clumping gays and lesbians into the same group as transguys and girls...but I'm quite sure she doesn't even know what transgendered means...) But then when talking about David (who is THE [literally] gay guy at school) whom she says she "loves to death" she describes him by making a limp wrist motion. She takes unnecessary pot shots at many gay people's sexuality...even fictional ones.

I continued to express my shock at the fact that Jessie had called Barack Obama what she did when Amanda (another student) heard us. After we told her what had happened she responded that I shouldn't be so surprised. After all, we *do* live in Kentucky.

That got me thinking. While, yes, I live in Kentucky, I have been fortunate enough to 1) live in Louisville, a relatively liberal city (especially for the south), 2) have been brought up by parents who did not distill any type of prejudice in me and 3) live now in a bit of a bubble of my own making; of friends and other people who I know will not give me shit. And while I know that discrimination and hatred exist in the world going to school at Spencerian has opened my eyes to the harsh reality that they exist in my backyard.

I don't think in my life time I have ever dealt with a person who was openly hateful of another "type" of person. Granted, in high school I dealt with kids who would shout the word "fagot" at a friend of mine while throwing candy at him. But they, I thought at the time, were just kids being stupid. I now know that those "kids" have not grown up and that they might now have kids of their own who they are teaching these hateful views to.

What baffles me even more though, is to know Jessie's back story. In high school she was picked on relentlessly by the kids at school. Presumably (though she has not told me) due to her weight and her various medical problems. She knows what it is like to be treated like shit because she is different. But yet, she hates others for the very same reason.

The only thing I can think of is that these two things (her being treated poorly in high school and her own 'prejudice' of black people) do not form a connection in her brain. She feels that they have no common thread. Because, I'm sad to say, she does not view black people as either people who have feelings or who diserve to be treated equally.

I am thankful that I have been able to tell a handful of people at school about John. I pick and choose very carefully who those people are. Very few people know, but I am becoming more open about it. I talk about it freely in the lunch room with Carolyn and Amanda and Amy when she is there. I told a guy in one of my classes today who was totally cool with it (he said since he grew up in Bosnia he was just thankful to be alive and didn't have any desire to hate others since he saw so much hatred in his own country.).

Part of me wants to tell Jessie. 1, I know that she could not do anything physical to me, and anything verbal she could say to me I could come back at her much more eloquently. I was an English major after all. Besides, anything that she could say would mean nothing because her words are backed with hate and not knowledge. And 2, maybe it would get her to leave me the fuck alone.

"Snow? What Snow??"

So, after taking 2 long hours to get John home from work on Monday I decided I was going to take a personal day, even if school was in session. I have no absences this quarter (except one in Filing) and it's already week 7 so, who cares. I had heard a rumor that Spencerian has only declared a snow day ONCE in recent memory, so the chances of having one on Tuesday were slim to none.

As the night was drawing to a close, WHAS11 news (the news channel we are told to check for school closing btw) had listed on their ticker that Spencerian was CLOSED. It did not say for what day, but it also did not specify night classes. This was at about midnight. I got up at 8:00 assuming we did not have school (and know I wasn't going to go even if we did...) only to log onto the school's website to find out that we were on a 2 hour delay.

JCPS (Jefferson County Public Schools for my Non-Louisville friends) was closed. About 80% of Spencerian's student population is single mothers with school aged children. Classes would not be letting out until nearly 6:00pm.

Did they *really* expect ANYONE to show up???

Apparently, about 30 students did. And only a handful of teachers. So many teachers weren't there, in fact, that students were instructed to go to the cafeteria for an "exciting seminar" (according to the signs still on the wall today) which turned out to be about how to take a test. If you did not show up for this seminar and sign in, you would be counted absent.

So, today, JCPS was on a delay, but we were on a regular school. I didn't make it to 2nd period (I don't have a 1st period....and yes, I'm in college and we have periods...and bells...) because of traffic and the fact that my neighborhood was covered in ice and snow. But Mrs. Wilds told me 3rd period (I have her 2 periods in a row.) was that our test that was to be on Thursday has been postponed until Monday. Same with 3rd period. Our quiz that was to be today will now be tomorrow. And our test that was supposed to be tomorrow will be on Monday. It's as though school was out, even though it wasn't.

There are rumors going around about if we'll be counted absent or not. The 30 students who WERE there don't think others should be 'cause they actually "braved the elements" and showed up. Those who didn't go say it shouldn't count as an absence because it said on TV that we were canceled, and once you have your answer, you're not normally going to recheck it later. Some rumors going around are that if you missed tomorrow and would have been dropped from class because of too many absences it won't count. But otherwise it will. I don't think that's fair because it should be everyone or no one.

Spencerian needs to get their fucking shit together. That is all I have to say about that. If the TEACHERS cannot get to the fucking school then *maybe* you shouldn't have class. Or at least make a decision and stick with it.

I'm tired of the bullshit of this school. Mrs. Wilds went over our test that will be on Monday. Basically asking us the questions that will be on the test. She got to one of them, a question about a specific drug. Turns out that drug was NOT ON OUR LIST of drugs to know. This list is made by the head of the department. The test is made by the head of the department. We told Mrs. Wilds that we did not have that drug. And said, "Then why is it on the test?? [pause] Well, I guess you all get a freebee."

I'm trying to stay calm about the whole thing. But I cannot get out of this school fast enough. If any of you ever think about going to Spencerian I HIGHLY DISCOURAGE it.

I Was Kidnapped!!!!!

Today was much better than yesterday. In fact, yesterday got much better after dinner. Kim, John and I went to the mall and well, went kinda crazy. It was so much fun to just let loose and not worry about anything or anyone. I didn't think about homework or what people were thinking. It was just pure fun.

We went to Pottery Barn, and I sat down at one of the desks where it's set up to show you how your desk could look like if you were rich and shopped at Pottery Barn. Anyway, I picked up the phone that's sitting on the desk and a little boy (maybe 3 years old) walked up to the desk and looked at me, so I said, "Do you have an appointment?" and he just looked at me like I was crazy. Then he said he wanted to play with the phone, so I handed him the phone and he tried to dial it and "talk" to the person on the other end, but he looked at me and said, "No one answered," so I told him that they must be at lunch. I also, at some point, asked him if he brought a resume, and what preschool he went too before his father dragged him away. It was too much fun!

Also at the mall 2 gay guys hit on John. Good times.

Today I was kidnapped by John and Kim and we went to the zoo. That, too was a lot of fun, but I was getting WAY behind on homework. After the zoo I got sucked in to watch The Puppy Bowl on Animal Planet, and homework/studying still did not get done. Then, Kim went crazy and John made us go to Lowes to look at paint.

At Lowes we walked around designing our future house that we're apparently going to all live in together with the money we're going to make from our hypothetical scrapbook store we're opening one day. We already named it: Scrapin' Crap.

We then went to Applebee's (T.V. commercials really do work since we saw a commercial for it during The Puppy Bowel) where the waitress was a saint putting up with us.

All in all it was a great weekend. I will more than likely fail my Pharm quiz tomorrow...but it will be okay since it's not worth too much of my grade anyway. I need to relax more and have fun.

I did tell them that they are not allowed to kidnap me any more this quarter. Only one kidnapping a quarter, and they used it up.

I'm exhausted. So, I think I shall go for now :D

Just Need To Get Through Today...

A friend of mine on Scrapbook.com PMed me and asked if I was ok. Here was my response. I think this is the best way to sum up my life since Thursday or so. I wanted to do an actual post going into a lot of detail about everything...but yeah, we all know that'll never happen. So, here it is:

Too much homework; too many tests on the same day (tomorrow) w/o enough time to study (as in getting the info. for the test and going over the entirety of one of the chapters that will be on the test the day before.); A horrible car crash outside of my school; the homework for one of the classes not making sense; my friend dealing with a lot of issues and needing me to help talk it through (not that I mind helping, but I just couldn't deal with it then.) ; my shoulder and neck hurting so bad I can barely sit at the computer; my theripist forgetting to call me last Thursday; my diabetes doctor appointment coming up (and knowing I'm going to get yelled at for a number of this at this appointment); my teacher asking in front of the class what was wrong as I'm having a panic attack and then taking me later (still while class is in session) into another room to try and help me with the test material only to not have any ideas.

I think that's it...and all of this lead to a nervous breakdown on my way to pick up John during witch I cried when I saw an owl (a live owl. Something you don't see often in Louisville), an ugly car, and when someone "stole" my gas pump at Kroger Fuel.

Plus Heath Ledger's death really got to me. Then the bs from Phelps and some jerk on Fox "news" as well.

I'm just worn out.

Just need to get to the end of today. I think I'll be okay then.

Grades and Doctors

So, I got my grades for all my test I have taken thus far (except for the 2 I took today...)

In Med. Law I got a 100%, even though I missed a few. I turned in a work sheet which was worth 5 points towards the test.

In Pharm I got a 92% after a 2 point curve. Awesome indeed.

In Coding II I got a 95%. I only missed one question, and it was the question I *thought* I had missed. So I wasn't too upset. I would have been upset if I had missed one that I thought I had gotten right.

In filing I deserve a medal. Since I get my homework (called Jobs) done earlier that nearly everyone else, Mr. Shafer "lets" me help other students that need help. I don't mind helping. I really, really don't. IF they are trying and have at least read the material before hand.

The 3 girls that sit behind me, haven't read anything and aren't really trying. They called me over and said, "I haven't done Job 1 yet, so do I have to do Job 1 before I can do Job 2??" I said yes, since it builds on each other. The cards that you file in Job 2 will be filed within the Job 1 cards. They looked disappointed and said, "Well...now I'm behind!"

Honey, you were behind last week when I helped you with Job 1 since you hadn't read the book. Then I had to explain to one girl what an acronym was. When I explained it to her she lite up like a Christmas tree and said, "Ohhh! That makes sense!!"

The same group also didn't understand what a cross reference card was for. Let's say the guys name is Richard Allen. You would want to make a cross reference card for Allen Richard since either of those names could be his first or last name. The girls thought that you would file Richard Allen under 'A' (correct) and file Allen Richard under 'A' as well (very, very wrong!!) What good would that do????

Okay, I'm going to stop bitching about my stupid filing class now with one last point, I did tell the teacher about them, not to be a tattle tale, but just to let him know. I said I don't mind helping people...if they try first. We'll see what happens.

Tomorrow I have a dr. appointment with a new GP. I'm going to tell her about my neck/shoulders and hopefully she'll tell me to go to some physical therapy

I Can't ThinkOf A Title For This

3 Great Ways To Start a Phone Conversation:

1. "AHHHH I HATE FELONS!!" <---Kim(ber)

2. "OMG! OMG!! Guess who I just say on TV!????!!!! Guess, guess GUESS!!!!!!" <---Emily

3. "So, I'm not sure if you'll find this funny or not, but....." <----Kristen


In other news about my day:

I got my first Filling test back today. I got the highest grade in the class, a 95%, a fact I know because the teacher informed the entire class that me and Joel (female, pronounced Joe-L) got the 2 highest grades in the class. Not that it was hard, it's freaking FILLING!!!

Took my first Medical Law and Ethics test as well as my first Pharmacology and Laboratory Terminology (aka Pharm) test today and think I did well. Even though I did not study for Med. Law at all. I'm sorry if the Judicial system is common knowledge for me. And I'm sorry that I am the *only* person in the class (including the teacher) who enjoys this class.

I wanted to hit Jessi today for getting mad at me for "picking on her because it stopped snowing." Man, I hate that girl. I also wanted to strangle her Thursday when she took it as a personal offense that it was raining. No I am not joking at all.

I have a test in coding tomorrow which should be no problem at all. In Med. Law we are starting the movie "John Q." which I have no desire to see. It seems interesting enough, but I *HATE* watching movies in class. The desks are not comfortable enough, and I have a hard time paying attention.

Not much else happened today. So...yeah.

In A Nutshell

Hey all!! I think I've found a height for my desk chair so that I can sit at my desk and use my computer with out killing my neck and shoulders. Yippy! Now if I could just find enough time to use the computer!

Anyway, so much has happened since I last posted, I don't even know how to start. So, I guess it's bullet time!!

• School has started, and while it will be a very busy and in ways tough quarter, it may also be one of the most enjoyable.
• Kim is moving to Louisville! Though she isn't going to move it with John as we first thought, she'll still be in town which will be awesome!
• John is looking for apartments of his own as well. He hopes to be in his own place by the end of the month.
• John told his boss's about being FTM and they are totally cool with it. They even changed his name on his pay check before he could get to the bank to do so!
• Back to school: My first class isn't until 9:10, which means I get to get up at 7:20 instead of 6:00 in the morning! Also, my last class lets out at 1:45 instead of 2:45 which means I get an extra hour to do whatever the hell I want
• I'm the only one it seems in the entire school who enjoys a class called Medical Law and Ethics
• There are only 5 people, including me, in my coding class this quarter, and 2 of them I cannot stand!
  

I think that is all for now. I will try to update more regularly.

"Can I See Your Vagina For A Minute?"

Oh...so you want an explanation to that title, huh? Well, okay. :D

I was sitting in the cafeteria studying the graphic of the female reproductive system which in a mere 1/2 hour I was going to need to label as part of our A&P final. I was minding my own business with my headphones on when John (a student in the class, not my boyfriend) walks up to me, sees the graphic and realizes he hadn't studied it at all yet. So, as I take off my headphones he says to me, "Can I see your vagina for a minute?"

If I was quicker I would have said something like, "If you're trying to pick me up, you need to try to be a bit more subtle..." But I'm not, so I just laughed and handed him the graphic. At that point, Michale also walked by (also in my class) so I fished out another copy (this one blank) I had copied for him to look at. John looks at me and say, "How many vaginas you got?"

At this point, Joe, who is sitting at a different table, and is not in our class, looks over and asks what the hell we're talking about. John says something like, "She's got a ton of vaginas over here!" I look at Joe and say something like, "Would you like to look at it too?"

This whole conversation went on for about 5 minutes. It just cracked me up. Too funny.

On another note, I think I did really well on the A&P finale. I think I did okay on the other finale, though, I'm not sure 'cause I had to rush to finish it.

Night all!

Really Quick Update

Today and tomorrow's rundowns:

~~ Had my Word Processing finale today which I think went well
~~ Almost didn't make it to my Word Processing final because of traffic. It took me 1 1/2 hours to get to school (normally takes me 20-30 minutes)
~~ Just finished Steph's Hanukkah present, which is good since she comes home tonight and tonight is the last night of Hanukkah
~~ Studying again tonight with dad
~~ Need to go over the female reproductive system diagram a few more times before tomorrow
~~ Need to plan out my answer for a question that will be on one of my finals tomorrow. The question is about Diabetes, so I think I'll be fine even if I plan very little
~~ Got my books and parking pass for next quarter today
~~ Tomorrow at 10:30 is my Anatomy final
~~ Tomorrow at 12:45ish (something like that, I'll look it up later) is my Advanced Terms final
~~ Need to write out notes to study for my Coding final
~~ Need to wrap Steph's present once it drys
~~ I REALLY want to scrap today
~~ It's too nice to be indoors all day (high of 69!! OMGWTF????) but I've got too much indoor shit to do :(
~~ I think that's it!

**EDIT** John just called and told me that he told Kathy about his name change and about the fact that he's FTM....and he didn't get fired!!! Whoooo!!!

On The First Night Of Hanukkah My Parents Gave To Me...

So, I was going to do the Hanukkah daily gift update...but I've been so busy with getting ready for finals that I haven't.

So, I'll give you a run down of the gifts thus far. I get one more tonight, and one from Steph when she gets home. (Yes, that's only 6...and yes, Hanukkah lasts 8 days...but as Steph and I have gotten older mom and dad have gotten us fewer things. I was actually surprised that I got 5!)

Day 1: Well, all I had asked for this year were a bunch of gift cards to various stores 'cause since I don't have a job I don't get to do too much shopping...and when I do I only have like 5 dollars or something for the store in question. So, most of my gifts were in very small boxes. Except for one. It was huge! I couldn't figure out what it was. So, I figured I'd open that one first since I wouldn't have time to do any shopping until the weekend anyway, and it was only Tuesday. So, I opened it and it was Electronic Monopoly!!! I was so excited, 'cause now I can play Monopoly by my self if I want to without as much difficulty. No one in my family likes to play Monopoly...so I'm normally stuck wanting to play w/o anyone else who wants to.

Day 2: Since I opened the biggest one first I opened the smallest one second. I got a gift card to Hambly Screen Prints. This was awesome 'cause you can't buy Hambly stuff here in Louisville. The bad thing was the site was down Wednesday night. But I was able to buy my stuff Thursday. Now I just have to wait until it comes in the mail.

The same night John and I exchanged gifts. He got me a BOB. It's from Brookstone. Maybe you've seen them: They look like eggs that wobble like weebles. They tell you the time, date, temp. and they have an alarm and timer on them. So cool.

I got John One Fish Two Fish Red Fish Blue Fish btw. :D

Day 3: This day I opened a gift card to Target for $30.00! I'm going to *try* to wait to use it until January when they have the "World Market" stuff. I always love that stuff, but am always broke.

This was the first night of Hanukkah that John was over, so he was able to open one of his gifts from my parents. He got a $25.00 gift card to Preston Art Center. Which is awesome 'cause that place has nice art stuff, but he only normally has money to shop at Hobby Lobby for art supplies.

Day 4: Yesterday I got a $30.00 gift card to iTunes! I already used some of it, but I still have $16.28 left. I bought some Stevie Wonder songs, and the 6 new songs from the Matchbox 20 album. I also got some other random songs.

John was over again, and this night he opened a gift card to Old Navy. I forgot how much it was for though. :/

One more night of gifts. I need to finish making Steph's gift as well as Kris'. I need to check my list again (man...I sound like Santa...) to see who else I need to get gifts made for. I sure hope I get Kris' done. I've barely started it, and I'm making him a mini book. Wish me luck on that one!

Finals start on Tuesday...I cannot wait to get these over with. I need a break.

My Grade is a What?

Wow. Okay, it's been WAY too long since my last post. But I have a very good reason. I sprained my wrist back on October 13th. It's finally starting to heal enough so that I can type without it killing me.

Not much really has happened over the last 4 weeks (Damn. Has it really been 4 weeks??). Just a lot of doctors appointments really.

There was one really crazy thing that's been on going that I will attempt to explain:

In my AP2 class we took our first test back on 18th of October. That next Monday we got our grades back, and I failed it...miserably. I got like a 36 or something equaly ridiculous. I studied...not as much or as well as I could have, but I did study. So when I got the crap grade I just figured I didn't study enough. Then, another student, John, got his test back. He apparently got a 50-something. Now, you have to understand that John is the smartest person in this class. He knows everything when we review. So, he was obviously upset and confussed that he failed the test.

He kept saying to Dr. Pressman that there had to be a mistake. Something was definitly wrong. But Pressman swore up and down that nothing was wrong. And as far as the rest of the class knew that was the end of it.

So, having failed the first test, I figured I had to bust my ass and pass the second one. The test was on November 1st. I went in, took the test, and left feeling rather confident that I passed.

Monday, we all go back into class expecting to get our 2nd test grade. But no! We were surprised by having to take the 1st test OVER AGAIN!!! WTF????

Dr. Pressman walked into the room and started handing out scantron sheets. Then he started handing out AP2 Test 1, told us we had to take it over, but didn't offer any explaination. When asked why, he responded, "ask your department manager." When one girl came in late (by like a minute...plus Pressman started the class five minutes early...) Dr. Pressman got angry. She apoligized and said she didn't know we were having a test today. Pressman responded by saying, "I didn't know until a few hours ago."

So I'm taking this test again. This test was over chapters 12-15. The Wednesday before we had just finnished discussing chapter 22. So, needless to say, what I remembered about these chapters was minimum at best. I started having a panic attack and almost started to cry. I nearly walked up to Pressmen with a half empty test and said, "I can't do this. I don't remember any of it." But I didn't, and I got through.

Tuesday we went back into class hoping for an explaination. Nope. When one student asked if he had our grades back he said, "The director has them, and as soon as I get them I'll give them to you." Then we asked about our 2nd test, and he said, "I haven't given those back yet?? Let me go find them." He came back with our tests, but said he hadn't double checked them yet. I got a 70, which is barely passing. I mean, if I had gotten a 69 I would have failed the test. Then we went over one of the questions. The answer was "A" and the whole class started saying, "I marked 'A' but it was counted wrong," including myself. So...basically I don't know my grade for that yet either.

Yesterday we went into class and started chapter 24. We our 3rd and final test a week from today, and then our final in a few weeks. It is nearly week 8 of the quarter (we only have 11 weeks, with the last one being finals week) and I have no idea of my grade in this class.

I'm really upset by this. Hopefully we'll get some answers today, though I doubt it.

Okay, my arm is starting to tighten up, so that's all for now!

My Day: A Run Down

Oh goodness. Why am I board?

Well, since I'm *so* board and have nearly an hour until my next class, let me run down my normal day this quearter at Spencerian:

My first class starts at 8:15. It's Word Processing 1 with a Bitch of a teacher. Since it's in the computer lab I can get there early and check email and stuff before class starts. Which is good 'cause the teacher is nomraly 10-15 minutes late anyway. Grr.

By the end of the quarter we have to turn in 4-5 5 minute timed writings with 40+ wpm and 5 or less errors. Then we have to do 3 "test-out timings" (same requirements). Well, as of yesterday I turned in all my regular 5 minute timings with my highest time being 60 wpm (5 errors) and 2 of my 3 "test-out timings." 1 more to go there.

Also, every Tuesday we get our packet for the week. The packets are due the following Monday at the end of class. This week's packet we learned how to copy and paste. Yeah. I'm nearly done with that too. Only thing I need to do there is fix some typo errors.

So, I wonder what I'm going to do Monday in that class...tomorrow I'll finish my last "test-out timing" I'm sure, fix my packet and take my 10 minute test on "find/replace."

Okay, Word Processing 1 gets out at 9:05. Then I have a 2 hour break until 11:05 when I have Anatomty and Physiology 2 with Dr. Pressman. I love Dr. Pressman except for his speed. He used to be a medical doctor and now teachers. He's like 80 or something. But he knows his shit! Love it. Only thing is we finished chapters 12-15 in 7 days!!! Insane. I talked to a friend that has someone else for AP 2 and they just finished chapter 13. Good God.

Okay, then I go straight to Advanced Medical Termanology for Medical Coding. I have Mrs. B. again, but I have to say she is a completley different person at noon than she is at 8:15. Also, the class only has 7 people in it. (Soon to be 6 I'm sure since one girl has already missed like 5 days...and we've only been here 10 and you only get 8 misses...). That class is actually a lot of fun. A lot of work, but it's cool.

Then I get an hour break (yeah, 3 hours worth of breaks every freakin' day. It's really not as great as I bet you think it is.). During this break Jessie and I have lunch. She's in my Med Terms class and the class I have after it which is:

Intro to Medical Coding. So far I am kicking this classes ASS! I completly get the coding. I love it, it's almost...fun! When I finish a homework assignment for the class I want more to do. Of course, we're only in the first part of the class, and I'm sure once we get to surgery codes it'll get harder, but for now I'm loving it.

Okay, so that's my day. I'm on campus from about 7:45 until 2:45 every day. It sucks. And around 5:00 I take a nap 'cause I just spent. Then I have dinner at 6:00 and then try and do some homework. But so far (knock on wood) I haven't had much 'cause I'm able to get most of it done during my 2 hour break in the morning.

Which is why I'm board now. I've nearly finnished my packet for Med Terms. Just 2 more things I need to do, but I have to do those at home. And I finished (more or less) my Word Processing Packet that I only started today. I have a test in Coding, which I'm going to study for with Jessie at lunch. And AP 2...well, I *should* be studing that since we have a test on the 18, but that's so far from now it can wait a bit.

Okay...well, that's all for now I guess.

Oh, wait no. John got a new job he'll be starting soonish! Can't wait. He'll be working normal shifts! 9-5 Monday-Friday! Woot! And he'll be making the same pay as he was at Target!!

Okay, my fingers are getting tired. All this 55+ wpm is killing me. lol

Am I Who I Thin k I Am??

So I took a trip down memory lane today, and wound up falling on my ass.

Have you ever felt like you're loosing your identity? Not like in a credit card theft type way. But that you aren't the same person you used to be and you don't really like that fact?

It started out with John and I looking through my art portfolio from high school. I didn't realize what really cool stuff I had done. And then I thought about how I don't do art any more. John informed me that scrapbooking is indeed art...and I agree...however, it's a completely different type of art. I don't know, it's not as artsy of an art. You still use the same principals of design (line, shape, space, color etc) but...it still feels different some how.

Anyway, as I was driving John home I started rambling about how I feel like when I'm at school I'm loosing my identity. I have to wear maroon scrubs for one thing. Everyone at school wears a different color depending on their program. Whatever. But I feel like a cow. Not as in fat, but in that I look like everyone else.

In high school I made it my mission to be different. I was NOT going to be the same as everyone else, and I wasn't. Now, I am. I feel like I'm selling out. In high school I had dreams of being a writer; being some type of artist; basically doing something creative as my career. Now I'm going to school for Medical Coding; the least creative thing ever. But I have to do what I have to do in order to make a good living so that I can support John and I, and support any artistic endeavors I choose to partake in later.

But I feel like people at school don't know the real me. They see the maroon wearing girl that looks like everyone else. That's why I'm not giving up my black-rimmed glasses just yet. They are really the only thing that stands out about me physically that yells, "I'm not the same as you!! Ha hahahah!!"

I hate that I'm so hung up on appearance. But I just want people to see the real me. And they aren't. They're seeing what the school makes me look like. And I hate it. They assume I'm just like everyone else. And I'm not. I'm sooooo very different. When I tell them I'm engaged they assume that I have a man that's just like every other man. And I don't. But I'm afraid to tell them the truth because so many of these people live in the boonies of KY or IN and barely know any gay people much less trans.

I don't know what to do with all this information. I guess just plug along through my next 3 quarters and deal. But I just feel like such a fake.

I Need To Update

I know I need to update...but not today. My computer is being a bitch. Not just the AOL Dial-up part of it. But the whole thing. John's sick (he's got strep) so I've been taking care of him. And my parents are still in Italy (they're coming back sometime Saturday) so I have to keep the house up and running by myself! Plus I just got back from Cincinatte yesterday and and still recovering!

One quick note about my finals: I got STRAIGHT FUCKING A'S!!!!!

Yeah, that's it. Hopefully things will calm down tomorrow and I'll update for reals.

I'm Free!

So, Sunday was my last day EVER at Michaels. I could not be happier. The last two days were rough..but I was determined to make it through them. It wasn't fun...but really, since Sam was fire back last November, had it ever really been?

Debbie was closing manager both nights, and she was her usual uptight self. Telling me how to do my job...when, obviously I know what I'm doing. I was so close to just leaving...but it has been SO long since I've left a job on good terms that I was determined to do so this time.

So, Sunday night, as we waited for the security alarm to ring so we know we could leave, I said "Bye everybody!" trying to be a bit sentimental. Maralynn said "bye" and so did most of the other girls...but Debbie just walked away.

Over a year I've worked with the woman, and she didn't even say goodbye. Fine. Be a bitch.

In other news...school is school. Not much really to say. I've been doing very well on all my tests, so that's good.

I also had lunch with a couple girls from my Med Terms class: Anglia and Chesney (sp?). It was awesome that they practically forced me to have lunch with them. I was literally in my car leaving Wendy's 'cause I had just eaten, and Anglia pulled up next to me and said, "Get your ass out of your car and eat with us!" So that was cool that they actually wanted my company!

And finally. I made this today...just a few minutes ago actually. I'm not sure what I'm going to do with it, but I think it's so cute that I must share it:


What do you think? I'm thinking I could make these on cards with different random things that the birds are saying. Could be cute stationary.

I've really gotten back into the whole "being creative" thing, which is fuckin' awesome! I've missed creating, and I'm glad I seem to be able to do it again. It's amazing what a reduction in stress can do for a person.

Well, I do have some homework to do, and then I'll be off to take John to work...so, see ya later :)

The Best News Ever In A Long Time

Today, July 25, 2007 I put my 2 week notice into Michaels!

I have never been happier about a decision I've made regarding work ever.

This is how it's gonna work:

Mom and dad decided that I have been way too stressed since school started. Which is very true. Weekends are hell since I have to get John to and from work (no bus) and work myself and study and do homework. Oh, and sleep and eat. So they decided that they would pay my AOL and my half of the phone bill. They'll still give me $190.00 every 2 weeks to help with gas and other expenses. John will still need to pay his half of the phone bill and both of us will still pay for gas for the car.

When mom told me this, I almost started to cry. It's taken such a burden off of me already, and I only just turned my notice in today. No more panic attacks before work because...I won't be working!!!!!

I just can't explain how relaxed this is making me. I'll have time to do things...like laundry and cleaning the basement...and scrapping!!! I won't have a lot of money...but hell, it's better to be sane and broke, than rich and crazy (just look at Britney Spears for an example of that!)

I still have to work this weekend, and probably next weekend as well...but that's IT! I feel like I can breath. It's wonderful.

I have some really funny photos to post later, but first I have to get them off my camera and onto my computer...we'll see when I get to that. Maybe in two weeks???